November 30, 2004

Piper Calling

As TNR's Noam Scheiber says:

The tiny ounce of consolation I took from Bush's re-election is that he'll now have to deal with all the time bombs he created during his first term.

Bomb one is the economy: No reputable economist is willing sign up with these guys.

Bomb two is, of course, Iraq.

Bomb three is foreign relations in general. Bush has to mend fences in Canada. Canada. How the hell does he deal with Iran? He can't even keep good relations with Canada.

In a final and unrelated note check out this trip to a Billy Graham Crusade:

Determined to understand this cult of heterosexual rage a little better, I approached a vaguely pretty but plain-looking 20-something girl holding a "Fag Sin" sign. Since she didn't respond to my questions about her fixation with gays, I tried to get her attention by asking her out for a nightcap.

Visibly startled at my proposal, the girl fought back a smile before falling back into line. "I do not drink alcohol and why would I want to go out with some pervert anyway?" she said with disgust. A few feet behind the girl, a lunky, middle-aged guy started stomping on an American flag while screaming to no one in particular, "See this flag? It's a fag flag. It's a faggot flag!"

Trying to ignore the flag-stomper, I assured the girl, "We don't have to drink alcohol. I'll get you a Shirley Temple if you want."

"But that would lead to fornication!" she snapped, seemingly shocked at my ignorance of the aphrodisiac powers of a Shirley Temple.

I cut our Colonial-era courtship ritual short and strode into the Rose Bowl, excited as a Jew at a Christian mega-revival could be.

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