December 31, 2008

Predictions for 2009

1. Rough times will continue. The Magic "Obama Boom" we will look back fondly on in 2022 will not start till 2010.

2. Burned on stocks, real estate, and oil the savvy investor will turn to comic books and tulips as the go-to investments of 2009.

3. The Obama administration will do four things to annoy the crap out of me, and will do 15 things that just tickle me pink.

4. Blago, John Doolittle and Paris Hilton will all go to jail in the coming year.

5. I'm going to get my personal finances in order. It's about time that compound interest work for me for a change.

6. There will be a huge crisis in some country we have never heard of before, but Secretary of State Hillary Clinton will fly in and settle that shit, fast.

7. I will miss the comic stylings of Sarah Palin, especial in these hard economic times.

8. Newt is due to make a big comeback.

9. A horse named Lickity-Split will win the Triple Crown.

10. Peace will not come to the Middle East.

What are your predictions?

Good News/Bad New

Good News: After a lifetime of public service, you have been appointed to the United States Senate.

Bad News: Govenor Blago just appointed you.

December 30, 2008

Highly Recomended

May I present a highly recommended new blog. Dazzling! Sexy! Clever! True!



December 29, 2008

Of Course He is.

Sarah Palin is now a Grandmother.

The babies name is...wait for it...


I'm going to miss Sarah Palin.


Want to see the economy fall apart in real time? The local new car dealership in my hometown shut down just before Christmas. GMAC, which has a world of trouble of its own, called in its loan. No credit, no business. So 60 people lose their jobs, every type of media - paper, radio, TV - in the area takes a huge hit with the loss of the biggest advertiser in the county. Local government takes a big loss in tax revenue and has to lay people off and so on. Now the same thing is happening elsewhere. Now repeat this scene 1,200 times over the next year and you have yourself a very bad economy.

December 22, 2008

Seasons Eatings

I'm not saying it's hard to stay in shape over the holidays, but on my way to the gym tonight I was offered a plate of cookies by a complete stranger. In the parking lot. The gym parking lot.

The universe does not want me in shape.

Even Toyota

Is down. Who bails them out? The Japanese government, right?

December 20, 2008

Most Evil?

The passage of Prop 8 has put about 18,000 couples in legal limbo. These are the folks who got married after the court ruling but before Prop 8 yanked back their right to marry. Guess who's leading the effort to undo these marriages?

Ken Starr

Yes, that Ken Starr

I believe that Mr Starr is making a very strong play for the title of worst. lawyer. ever.

December 18, 2008


In the phrase "The phone is ringing off the hook" does it mean that the phone is ringing so much that its fallen off the hook or that the phone is ringing even though it has already been picked up?

All I want for Christmas

Is a Space Shuttle.

December 17, 2008

Free Money!

The Fed just dropped its prime lending rate to .25%, which is a pretty damn good interest rate if you can get it. I'm at 14% with my credit card, 6.5% with my car and 4.5% with my student loans. Maybe I should get a Fed loan! I would much rather pay .25%! What does it take to become a bank? Can anybody do it? Could the First Mattress Trust qualify?

December 16, 2008

Bad Old Days

Keith Olbermann on Countdown put together a top twenty-five most corrupt American politicians. Man we had some corrupt mo-fos back in the day. The Grant Administration was mind-blowingly terrible. Congressman Andrew Jackson May of Kentucky actually killed at least 38 American soldiers by foisting a bad defense contractor on the US Army during WWII. Boss Tweed was estimated to have stolen something on the order of $3.2 billion in today's dollars.

The popular story is that America was clean and innocent until Watergate took it all away. But we've had corruption and dirty deals from the beginning. The sad truth is, overall, we are a lot more clean than we used to be, Governor Blago, notwithstanding.

December 15, 2008

Nightly Nerdom

New trailer for Wolverine.




The Road Not Taken

Check out the Obama logos that didn't make the cut. Some real disasters were averted.

I mean could you have voted for a guy who used this as a logo:

Oh, how history turns on the subtle turns of graphic design.

December 12, 2008

Old School Hotness RIP

A legendary hottie of the old school, Bettie Page, has died. We here at Craigorian Chant offer a 21 shwing salute in her honor.

I'm Colin Powell, Bitch.

Let's Palin have it.

I think she (Palin) had something of a polarizing effect when she talked about how small town values are good. Well, most of us don’t live in small towns. And I was raised in the South Bronx, and there’s nothing wrong with my value system from the South Bronx.

I love it. Nobody ever talks this way. People have been talking about the wonder that is small town America for about 200 and some odd years now. Bout time somebody speak up for the city, where the vast majority of the people live.

December 11, 2008

Ripples and Lapdances

The bad effects continue to ripple through the economy. Sadly, even strip clubs have had to cut back on both prices and hours.

It's really the strippers who are getting screwed on the deal. Their pay is getting cut in half, just so the club owner can keep butts in seats and sell more watered-down drinks.

The girls need to form a union.


Auto bailout passed the House, looks to get tied up in the Senate, mainly due to the threat of GOP Senators filibustering. Does the GOP really want to take credit for destroying the domestic auto industry? I know the issues with Detroit are many, but after hundreds of billions for banks, cries for fiscal responsibility ring very hollow. Without those loans, these guys are going down, lots of people are losing their jobs in an already bad economy. Does the GOP really want to own that? Kiss Michigan, Ohio, and Indiana goodbye for a generation?

Not to mention you've got Republican Governors running around trying to be Hoover, part 2.

This really can't be what they want, is it?

UPDATE: Yep, the GOP went and done it. Now the White House, a little more aware of the world than the Republican Senators, is scrambling to find another way.

December 10, 2008

TV Time

I just finished the very last episode of The Wire on DVD. Man, there is just no justice in this world sometimes.

Casting about for a new show, may I suggest Leverage? Good old fashion con/heist action, with the added bonus that the targets are the great villains of this age, the corporate crooks.

Plus, the show runner is John Rogers of Kung Fu Monkey. Scroll back through his archives for some pretty cool behind the scene and inside the writer's room stuff.

F- Me, No, Thank You!

I think this is one of the more politically valuable "[Expletive] them" in recent memory.

December 9, 2008


Illinois Governor Rod Blagojevich, whose been under investigation for years on corruption and has a single digit approval ratings, just got arrested. Among the charges it appear he was trying to sell off the vacant Senate seat formerly held by Mr Obama. The US Attorney on this case is Patrick Fitzgerald, notable for being the guy who got Scooter Libby, before the whole Presidential commutation of sentence thing.

This makes replacing Obama in the senate rather complicated.

December 8, 2008


Blogs might have stopped Hitler.


Last Chance Gone

The Supreme Court has declined to hear a challenge to Obama's citizenship.

Obama will be President.

The football is not going to get pulled away.

This is actually going to happen.

December 7, 2008

Meet Your New SecState

We Lost. Yeah!

The only Democrat I am happy to see beaten this cycle has been beaten. The good voters of Louisiana has tossed William "I have no idea how $90,000 in cash ended up in my freezer" Jefferson out on his ass.

Corrupt little bastards are going down, irregardless of party.

Yeah elections.

December 5, 2008


Behold the latest in horror shows: The Monthly Job Report:

With the economy deteriorating rapidly, the nation’s employers shed 533,000 jobs in November, the 11th consecutive monthly decline, the government reported Friday morning, and the unemployment rate rose to 6.7 percent.
Over all, the job losses since January now total more than 1.9 million, with most coming in the last three months as consumers and businesses cut back sharply in response to the worsening credit crisis.

“Business shut down in November,” said Mark Zandi, chief economist at Moody’s “Businesses are in survival mode and are slashing jobs and investment to conserve cash. Unless credit starts flowing again soon, big job losses will continue well into next year.”

The report on Friday by the Bureau of Labor Statistics included sharp upward revisions in job-loss figures for October (to 320,000 from the previously reported 240,000) and for September (to 403,000 from 284,000).


December 4, 2008

December 3, 2008

The War for History

A. Serwer at TAPPED highlights efforts by both the Bush team and Bush himself to shore up his historic legacy. Apparently, there is a Bush legacy project already meeting at the White House, staring all the old favorites, including Karl Rove.

We need a Bush legacy Team B. Something to counter this. Someone to show up on TV ten years from now and remind everyone just how bad the Bush years were. Whenever someone tries to publish a book rewriting history or to rename a school or a courthouse after Bush, they need to be there.

The One that Got Away

Saxby Chambliss has survived a run-off down in Georgia, which means that Dems are going to be short of the 60 vote filibuster-proof majority in the incoming Congress.

Darn. I mean, it's a Senate race in Georgia, but still. Darn.

The last race to be determined is Franken's.

Fingers crossed.

December 2, 2008


There are certain writers that you need for certain jobs. You wouldn't want Rolling Stone's Matt Taibbi to write a heartfelt remeberance or striring tribute. Taibbi's calling is pissing on the grave of someone's political career. He does his job very well in this post-scrip on the McCain campaign.

December 1, 2008

Let's Be Clear

If you though times were tough, you're right. The economists have done their dismal science and now figure that we've been in a recession for the last year.

Meet the Team

Obama makes it official today, naming his national security team. The headliner is Hillary as SecState of course but keeping Gates at SecDefense is notable at well. This is a good team. If they all pull in the same direction, this Country should go somewhere.

November 28, 2008

Power Back On

Samantha Power, who got caught up in some campaign b.s. back during the endless primary, is getting a job with the transition team. Sure, we can loose the occasional hack to campaign crap, but Power is way too important to let go over little crap.

November 26, 2008


Too many jokes...

Page Six is reporting that right-wing agitator and controversy-seeker Ann Coulter's jaw is wired tightly shut.

November 25, 2008

How Will They Know?

News from FoxNews:

“Hannity & Colmes,” the longest-running program on the Fox News Channel, will soon be without Colmes.

Alan Colmes, 58, the liberal half of the 9 p.m. show, will leave his daily hosting duties at the end of the year, the network announced Monday.

While the network remained quiet about its plans for the political debate program, two people close to the network said that Sean Hannity, 46, Mr. Colmes’s conservative counterpart for the last 12 years, would become the sole host of the hour.

No really, how is this different?

Quote of the Day

"Republicans are going to be to some extent almost irrelevant in the next two years."

Former Louisiana GOP Congressman W. Henson Moore

From a story on the shake-up on K-Street.

November 24, 2008

November 21, 2008

Yo Ho Ho Ho...

Piracy is the new news. Robert Farley has booth words and video. For even more cool pirate info, check out this Live Global Map of pirate attacks.

November 20, 2008

Play at Home

Think you can guess what a voter intended? Thanks to Minnesota Public Radio, you can see the challenged ballots and take you best shot at figuring out who intended to vote for whom.

And before you despair over the state of the American voter, keep in mind these are the dumbest, sloppiest, weirdest voters out of some 3 million voters in this Senate race. Normally these folks don't matter, but with a margin this close, every stray pen mark matters.

I mean, an extra write-in vote for the "Lizard People?" What, is that suppose to be funny?

Al Franken as Senator would be funny. But you know, in a good way.


Let's Do a Deal

As a member in good standing with the liberal agenda, I can make the following offer to my right-wing fellows. We will give up our non-existent drive to bring back the fairness doctrine and drive Rush from the airwaves if you agree to, let's say, health care reform.

What do you say?

November 19, 2008


Missouri has finally called. McCain won by 3,632 votes out of more than 2.9 million cast. Let's all just say a little thank you to fate for the fact that this election didn't come down to Missouri. Who amoung us wanted to wait two weeks.

New World

Ayman al-Zawahri, second in command of a organization dedicated to the violent destruction of the United States and a proud son of Egypt, doesn't think that Obama is black enough:

In al-Qaida's first response to Obama's victory, al-Zawahri also called the president-elect..."house negroes."

November 18, 2008

Bad Idea

Should not have done this. Mark my words, Lieberman will screw Obama and the Dems before the term is out. On some foreign policy question, right at a key moment, Lieberman with will repay this kindness. I'm completely sure of this.


Ted Stevens is done.

Now Alaska only has to account for that whole Palin thing.

Too High a Price

Obama has to give up E-Mail.

I couldn't. Could you?

Best Pirate I've Ever Seen.

I've been treating the fact that piracy has returned to the waters off Somalia like some kind of fluke - imagine, pirates, in this day and age! But news that they were able to snatch a fraking supertanker carrying more than $100 million worth of crude makes this officially serious. Serious means anything that raises my gas prices. Where's the navy? Not just ours, all of them. I'm thinking stopping piracy is a basic function of the navy. Billions of dollars gets spent each year for you to sail around in your fancy boats. There are no wars at sea going on. It's time to use that boat for something other than picking up chicks in foreign ports.

Get on it.

UPDATE: Score one for the Indian Navy.

November 17, 2008

Job Go Bye-Bye

It's not just Citigroup that's laying people off.

Poor Focus on the Family is dumping people too.

Both banking and mucking around with gay folk's marriages are suffering industries these days.


It's All Crap

But you knew that already. Everything the McCain-Palin ticket said about Obama during the campaign was crap. Crap that they didn't even believe. Cause if they really beleived that Obama was the terror-loving socialist they claim, then McCain wouldn't be meeting with Obama today and Palin wouldn't be looking forward to working with him.

I wouldn't take a meeting with a terrorist-lover. I wouldn't love forward to working with someone who would endanger our nation.

It was all crap.

November 16, 2008

Go on Now

Cowboy Junkies - Sweet Jane

Good News

One of the most notable Democratic Party operatives ever, the magnificently named Greg Craig, is going to be named White House Counsel.

November 14, 2008

What Just Happened?

Via Ezra, a really interesting write-up on the financial meltdown. Even the people right there in it could not believe or even understand what was happening. I kid about the whole mattress thing, but this story makes me want to never allow anyone to "manage" my money ever again. I need to read me some Liar's Poker.


Bush is now a cautionary tale. All would-be invaders and would-be Caesars beware, things can go south for you in a hurry.

November 13, 2008

Still Here?

Sarah Palin is everywhere. It's like she's getting all those interviews the McCain campaign was denying her, cause she's a idiot. She's still an idiot, still doesn't know anything, but now she's being asked questions that you can be an idiot and still answer, like "how do you feel about..?" and "in the future you will..?"

Dodged a bullet there, American, dodged a bullet.

November 12, 2008

Numbers Game

I take back some of the bad things I've said about the good State of Alaska. Ted Stevens is now down three votes as more and more late votes come in. THREE VOTES.

UPDATE: 814 Votes! That's got to be a comforting margin of victory these days.

What's It To You?

Olbermann is getting a four year contract extension. He's not going away.

November 11, 2008

Bonus: You Get a Code Name

The Secret Service code names for the incoming First and Second Families:

Barack Obama - Renegade

Michelle Obama - Renaissance

Malia Obama - Radiance

Sasha Obama - Rosebud

Joe Biden's - Celtic

Jill Biden - Capri

Sure, you have to eat rubber chicken and trudge though the snow of Iowa and give speech after speech after speech and have Sean Hannity tell America that you're a terrorist night after night. But in the end, you get a code name. A really cool code name.

November 10, 2008

R-Rated World

Joe Scarborough drops the F-Bomb on MSNBC, ironically while trying to bash incoming CoS Rahm Emanuel's heavy use of the word. Ha, Ha.

Look, we live in an R-rated world, filled with sex and violence and most of all, cussing. I hear cussing everyday. So do you. I myself went to the F-Bomb just today, when a tree planting exercise took a wrong turn. The world of politics, filled with competition, high-tension negotiation and people getting screwed with their pants on. Of course it's filled with swearing. Working on a campaign was where I learned my favorite curse of all time "What a cluster f--k" (lots of things get screwed up on campaign.) Everybody curses up a storm in the world of politics. When from time to time it slips out on TV, why do we always act so shocked?

Measuring the Drapes

Changing of the Guard:

President Bush and first lady Laura Bush welcomed President-elect Barack Obama and his wife, Michelle Obama, to the White House on Monday afternoon.

Bush and Obama held a private meeting in the Oval Office, while the first lady gave the incoming first lady a tour of the residence.


November 9, 2008

Rock On

How's everybody feeling tonight? Missing that certain someone?

November 7, 2008

Memo to World

New American President is a black guy:

Italian Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi gave an enthusiastic, if unconventional, welcome on Thursday to the election of Barack Obama, citing among his attributes youth, good looks and a "suntan."

I know it's a new thing, but try and get your head around it.


That's the current Al Franken vote deficit. He picked up 100 votes when an error was corrected. Somebody entered 24 instead of 124. For those of you who miss Florida, I give you the great State of Minnesota.

November 6, 2008

Alaska Makes Me Question...

...Democracy itself.

If you read much about the underpinnings of the American Revolution, you hear a lot about Civic Virtue. If we put the people in charge, are they going to be virtuous enough not to lead us to disaster.

Well, what the hell Alaska? You sent a bad man back to office, knowing full well what he was. Why did you do it? For the pork? If a man gets you enough worthless bridges, do you forgive him anything? Between this and the Palin thing, Alaskan voters are rabidly getting a reputation for bad, bad choices. As it should be. We need to make examples out of some folks, to inspire everyone else.

Have to keep up the civic virtue somehow.

Transistion Time

Can I get a job? Maybe provisional assistant vice-undersecretary of something? This part is really fascinating. Who gets what job. Who's going to be good, who's going to be a disaster. Did everyone pay taxes on their illegal immigrant nanny?

UPDATE: Ok, here's the actual web page for you to apply for a job with the Obama Administration. I'm all talk, but if you want to...

November 5, 2008

In Other News

Son of a...

Both Al Franken and Charlie Brown are down by just a few hundred votes in their races. Definitely recount territory, but I would much rather they be up a little than down a little.

I cannot believe that the good people of Alaska just reelected a convicted felon to the United States Senate.

Dems are at +5 in the Senate, with a few races left to play out. Time to dump Joe Lieberman.

Prop 8 is winning. Damn. The Supertrain looks like its going to squeak it out. As is redistricting.

Dems pick up at least 20 in the House, with some more races left to finish.

Oh, and President Obama. Wow.

November 4, 2008

Yes We Can

How We Doing?

5:30 Early result very not surprising. I'm mostly watching MSNBC on the TV and CNN election central on the web. No battle grounds called, except for PA, which got called right away for Obama. So much for that "battleground"

5:40 Libby Dole is toast.

6:02 CNN now has it 174-49 Obama with the 6:00 pm poll closings. No battlegrounds yet, but that looks good. Keep in mind that CA is worth 55.

6:08 Udall wins in New Mexico. The Dems are at +4 in the Senate.

6:24 Ohio! MSNBC calls. Easy night.

6:25 Damn looks like McConnel, that little worm, is going to make it. But he's going to be leading a lot less Republicans in the Senate.

6:40 Who puts Obama over the top? I'm kind of hoping we get to 8:00 pm and CA. But Florida or Virgina could spoil the fun. Take your time counting folks.

7:03 Next round of poll closings. Utah for McCain, Iowa for Obama. You got one hour left to vote in California. Move.

7:11 Last of his kind. Chris Shays is done. There are now no GOP Congressman from all of New England.

8:00 The coast makes toast. Obama is the next President of the United States.

My Story

I voted. Dodged the morning rush at my polling place, so no waiting. One poor bastard was stuck in bureaucratic limbo, not showing up on any of the lists, but everyone else was voting smoothly. Did you know that Allen Keys is on the ballot this year? No, for President. I had no idea. I had to make a snap decision on a Community College bond measure and an adjustment to local utility taxes. I hoped I picked right.

Tell me your voting story.

Today is the Day

This is it. If you haven't already, get your ass to the polls. This is about choosing the path our nation will take. Here and now. No one vote will be enough. Voting is about faith. Faith in each other. It's doing your part, and counting on your fellows, all across the Nation, to do theirs. Tens of millions of little parts, and they add up to something extraordinary. I do not promise you perfection. This is not about salvation, or utopia or paradise. But if you all do what you can do, we can make a better world.

November 3, 2008

One Day More

Now is your time.

Don't Temp the Thing from on High

Something to keep in mind.

Let's Review

Voter guide is here. Study hard, or just print that sucker out and take it with you.

There's a measure on the ballot in San Fransisco to legalize prostitution. Woo? Maybe. I'm sort of torn. What do you think? Prostitution is your classic victimless crime, until it isn't. All kinds of nasty associated with prostitution, exploited immigrants, nasty pimps and the like.

Still not sure who I'm going to vote for in the Mayor's race. Very unsettling for me.

What are some local issues, you, the loyal readers are considering?

Looking For Drama

There might not be enough drama in the Presidential race to hold your attention for the entire night. But if you're like me, you need to stay up all night Tuesdays, you need some drama to hold your interest. Well, how about the Al Franken race? Polls are very close, with some showing Al up, some with him down, but always very, very close. There's a third party guy whose scrambling the results, and Coleman has had a rash of late-breaking scandals. Gosh darn it, this is where you find drama. And I like it.

Oh and for extra Senate drama, the Georgia race could go to a run-off in December. Georgia law required a run-off if no one get 50%, and a Libertarian is running strong enough to make that happen. The Dems race to get to 60 votes in the Senate could go into overtime.

October 30, 2008

Famous People Say Go Vote!

Don't Argue.

Why Are You Not Done?

Look, the press just isn't saying that Obama is winning. They keep making noise how the race is "closing" that polls are "tightening." Fine, you want a close race, I understand. But you can't then turn around and fault Obama for not putting the race away, like Howard Fineman is doing here. Obama is leading in every poll. Every single one. He's got a huge electoral college advantage, no matter who is doing the EC projection. The press could totally be doing "it's over, next story" type stories. But for a variety of reasons, they are not. But you can't fault Obama for not winning when you won't give him credit for winning.

October 28, 2008

Divided Government?

One of the desperate ploys that McCain has been using as of late is raising the specter of undivided Democratic control of Washington. He seems to be saying, you can let the donkeys have Congress, but don't let them have the Presidency too. Would this really work? If I support the Democratic Congress and their agenda, why would I want President McCain vetoing the bill the Democrats pass? Divided government comes from non-ideological, "personality" voters. People who like McCain, think he's mavericky, but also like their local Democratic congressman. Nobody thinks "I want the Democrats in office, but I wouldn't want them to actually do anything.

October 27, 2008

People You Depend On

Remember that scene in Fight Club, where Tyler Durden warns off the chief of police:

Hi. You're going to call off your rigorous investigation. You're going to publicly state that there is no underground group. Or... these guys are going to take your balls. They're going to send one to the New York Times, one to the LA Times press-release style. Look, the people you are after are the people you depend on. We cook your meals, we haul your trash, we connect your calls, we drive your ambulances. We guard you while you sleep. Do not... fuck with us.

Well, what happens when the very people who the McCain campaign depends on to spread their slimy attacks rebel. An entire call center in Indiana walked out rather than read the crap the GOP wanted to put out. The people who work in call centers are not Republicans. They are not going to get John McCain's tax cut. They are going to get better health care with Obama and worse health care under McCain. If enough of them get wise to the situation and make their stand, the whole system could come crashing down.

I love the smell of political awareness. Smells like - victory!

Senator Toast

Senator Ted Stevens of Alaska, notable open sore on the legislative process, has been convicted of all counts in his corruption trial. Which is pretty damn embarrassing, considering he's up for re-election in eight days.

Last Week

Just think. This is the last chance for everything. So its time to unleash all the attacks that were too stupid/low/evil to bring out till now.

This the week that they have to top the Obama is a terrorist/socialist.

What can they do to top that?

October 24, 2008

Hi, I'm No on Prop 8

My God, We liberals are hip.

Rise of Bono

U2 remains on track in its quest for global domination. Bono has been hired to write op-ed pieces for the New York Times. Not just a one shot, special celebrity guest pieces. 6 to 10 of them. He's well on his way to save the world. And by "Save" I mean rule the world.


Now is the time for all those moderate Republicans who suffered silently for the last eight years to get the hell out of the party. Former Massachusetts governor Bill Weld is only the latest to join in. This isn't exactly a profile in courage for these folks. Obama looks strong, and all of these folks are out of office. Still, having a host of Republicans endorse Obama isn't unhelpful when the other guys are running around screaming "terrorist" and "socialist".

October 23, 2008

Guest what?

Thanks, Craig, for the keys to the kingdom.

Here's one of MY favorites: Essayist/comedian David Sedaris on undecided voters:

"To put them in perspective, I think of being on an airplane. The flight attendant comes down the aisle with her food cart and, eventually, parks it beside my seat. “Can I interest you in the chicken?” she asks. “Or would you prefer the platter of shit with bits of broken glass in it?”

To be undecided in this election is to pause for a moment and then ask how the chicken is cooked."

Aren't liberal gay men FUN?

Keep it Close

Ezra Klein flags the media taking the one poll in 13 that shows a close national race. While at this points it's pretty damn easy to paint a picture that shows Obama running away with this, it's actually in no one's interest to show the election as a beat down. Obama doesn't want his voters to get compliant. McCain doesn't want his voters to despair. And the media doesn't want to cover a lopsided affair. They want drama, hard-fought, down-to-the-wire action, very much like the last couple of elections. And so they will get that kind of race, even if they need to invent it out of whole cloth.

October 22, 2008


Sarah Palin never fails to disappoint. She continues to be unable to answer even the most basic of questions. She was asked by a third-grader, "what the Vice President does" and got her answer wrong.

And now comes news that the RNC has spent 150 grand outfitting Palin and her family in clothing. Nothing says "working-class gal" like $150,000 worth of Saks Fifth Avenue.

Is it any wonder that the Palin pick has become a massive drag on the GOP ticket? Palin is now the most cited concern that voters have about McCain. The GOP attitude in recent years is that they can spin their way out of everything. All screw-ups, be it bad policy, mis-statements, bad personnel choices, scandal, etc., can just be handled with an aggressive public relations policy. There's never a move to make a real change. Don't change course on the war, fire Roberto Gonzales or admit that you picked the wrong person for VP. Just spin harder. Hell, Larry Craig is still in office, thinking he could spin he way out of a frickin bathroom solicitation conviction. But spin has its limits, and the GOP has found those limits. Those limits are going to absolutely murder them in 13 days.

October 20, 2008

Voter Guide Time

Good God 12 propositions. Good thing you have me to read this crap. Here we go.

Oh and the numbers have reset again. Back to one.

Prop 1 High Speed Rail Bond. SUPERTRAIN! This is your chance to bring in the future. Getting it started, anyway. The Chant recommends Yes.

Prop 2 Animal Confinement. Puts in some basic standards for how we house farm animals. To keep their lives from completely sucking. You know, before we eat them. The Chant recommends Yes.

Prop 3 Children's Hospital Bond. Think of the children. The sick children. The poor, sick children with big eyes and big hearts. Eyes that look right though you. The Chant recommends Yes.

Prop 4 Notification for Abortions for Minors. Again. We are voting on this one again. For like the third election in a row. It loses every time. Help it lose again. The Chant recommends No.

Prop 5
Drug Treatment. Diverts drug users from jail to treatment. Will cut down on the massive California prison population and get some help for those poor drug-addicted bastards. The Chant recommends Yes.

Prop 6 Police Funding. Gang Crimes. No, no, no. This is an attempt to lock in funding for law enforcement to the state budget. Mucking up the process even more. Making it even harder to get a budget. This is all wrong. The Chant recommends No.

Prop 7 Renewable Energy. Sounds good on first blush, but this measure is actually opposed by all the environmental groups and existing alternative energy providers. I'm done taking chances on energy reform in California. Write something everyone signs off on or no deal. The Chant recommends No.

Prop 8 Ban on Gay Marriage. Bans gay marriage. If this passes, my dream of marrying Daniel Craig, taking his name and becoming Craig Craig will die. Don't deny me that dream. Also, don't be an ass. Let folks love each other. And get the tax break. The Chant recommends No.

Prop 9
Victims' Rights. A bunch of stuff for crime victims in the justice system. Warm fuzzy stuff that costs a ton of money and jeopardizes fair trials for the accused. The Chant recommends No.

Prop 10
T Boon Picken's Prop. Alternative fuels. I'm rather suspicious of Texas oil billionaires who want to sell me something. Besides, we are spending our money on trains and sick kids. Oh and vets. Keep reading. The Chant recommends No.

Prop 11 Redistricting. Oh yes. Right now the Legislature draws the districts for the legislators. You see the problem? They draw secure districts where no one loses. We need to stop this. It's not a cure for all our ills, but it's the single best change to the system I know. The Chant recommends Yes.

Prop 12 Veterans Bonds. Yeah. We owe them. The Chant recommends Yes.

I'm exhausted. When do we get the prop that ends props? I'd vote for that.


Colin Powell endorses Obama. Um yeah, just take it. Don't quibble.

Obama raised 150 million+ in September.

Most campaigns have to be making hard choices right about now. Spend the last ad dollars in Ohio or Florida? Radio ads or extra money for GOTV? But the Obama campaign doesn't have to make hard choices. They have a staggering amount of money, they can do it all. Run ads everywhere they need to and throw in some extra states just for fun. Buy half-hour blocks of network time to make their case in depth. Put together a massive ground game and a massive media buy. Do it all.


Last day to register to vote in California. Hurry up already. There is going to be some historic stuff going down in 15 days. Trust me, you want in on this.

October 17, 2008


In times of great stress, its not uncommon for people to seek comfort by going back to simpler, more innocent times. Go back to your childhood. Why I nearly cried out for my blanket today at work. The GOP is under a lot of stress right now. Unfortunately the past that they are regressing back to is Hoover and McCarthy.

Not so innocent times, those.

Funny Time Out

In one of the odd features of American Presidential campaigns, both candidates traditionally go to the Alfred E. Smith dinner and give speeches. Funny speeches.

October 16, 2008


Hardcore socialist Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez is now mocking Bush over joining the socialist revolution. He does have a point.

McCain the Angry

Why is McCain so pissed? Did he expect to run for President unopposed? The man has been a professional politician for over thirty years. He can't take a little criticism on his health care policy? McCain plays craps, Obama plays poker. You can see it on their faces.

October 15, 2008

Asked and Answered

That's my favorite line in courtroom dramas. Tonight it was asked and answered. Obama had answered all the questions and McCain couldn't come up with anything new. Ayers is old hat at this point. ACORN is not a threat to the fabric of democracy. Crys of Liberal, Liberal, Liberal and Big Government ring very hollow in the wake of a 750 billion dollar bailout that McCain himself supported.

And Obama wins all the snap polls. Again.

This summer, McCain was running around demanding that he and Obama hold ten debates. I wonder if he still wants more after three.

And Now...

...A few words from Hayden Panettiere. Not safe for work, unless your work is a lot more fun than mine.

See more Hayden Panettiere videos at Funny or Die

October 14, 2008

Should Be. Is!

All though the fall the GOP fall-back horse race talking point has been "Given all that's going on, Obama should be up at least 15 points over McCain"

Well, now Obama is up 14% in the latest NYTimes/CBS poll.

Should be up big. Is up big.

Tis the Season

Yes we Carve

Because everything, even your pumpkin, must serve the cause this year.

October 13, 2008


If Bill Clinton at his worse was some sort of daytime soap opera, John McCain brought low is Goddamn tragedy - Shakespeare or maybe Greek. Noble war hero brought low by the grab for power. And everything he trys blows up. Palin crumbles up a little more each day. He can't win a debate. He trys to smear Obama as a friend of terrorists, but his own crowds turn so ugly he has to back down.

He's doing everything he needs to do, compromised every principal, sold out every ideal. And he's losing anyway.


Just Kidding

Stocks - what an amazing investment.

I'm going to go out on a limb and say that today's market isn't based on anything real. Even if it goes in the right direction, these kinds of swings just can't be healthy.

The Mattress Trust is still available. Security you can sleep on.

The Nobel Victor

Paul Krugman has won the Nobel prize in Economics. So now you have to listen to what he says.

October 12, 2008


For some reason, I feel that music of the 1930's is an appropriate selection.

Benny Goodman Orchestra - Sing Sing Sing


The Spanish national team, as a reward for winning the European Championships, received their weight in beer.


October 11, 2008

The California To Come

I will welcome the coming anarchy as long as it has a beat.

2Pac - California Love

October 10, 2008

No Joke

Al Franken is fricking winning! Here's the lowdown. A combination of the economy, backfiring attacks, and scandal (for the other guy)


End of the World

Stocks are down, um, everywhere. Welcome to the new world. Everybody goes down together.

Spread the word.

The word is "panic"

October 9, 2008

Finish Them!

Kos rallies the troops.


We are taking the banks! We are taking the insurance companies. Soon we, the united workers of glorious America's Peoples Republic will have control of all of means of finance and production.

Capitalism is going down, bitches!

October 8, 2008


Oh just look at those beautiful electoral map projections. Nevada, Virgina, Florida, all for Obama. Tied in North Carolina. A tear runs down my cheek. Such a wonderful vision.

October 6, 2008

Bit and Pieces

Bluegrass legend Ralph Stanley has cut a radio ad for Obama. You may know him as the voice that sings "Oh Death" in O Brother Where Art Thou. Just an amazing voice.

Shakira has endorsed Obama as well. T-Bogg notes her, um, assets.

I figure we take Shakira's Ass and Ralph Stanley's voice and go on tour with Bruce.

That 3 million extra votes right there.


We are going to hear a lot about "taking the gloves off" in this next stage of the campaign. I would just like to note that the main reason that you wear gloves is not to protect the guy getting punched, it to protect the guy who's punching. Your hands are filled with lots of little bones and tendons. Very breakable little things. You can really hurt yourself punching. Most self defense systems put punching with bare fists last on the list of things you do. The gloves, the wraps and the tape you see on boxers and MMA guys is so you don't break your hand hitting the other guy repeatable in the face (Like so).

All of which is say, John McCain is just going to hurt himself with this crap.

The Chicago Way

They pull a knife, you pull a gun. He sends one of yours to the hospital, you send one of his to the morgue. That's the Chicago way!

The Untouchables

He might have been born in Hawaii and raised all over, but Obama came up as a politician in Chicago. McCain is growing increasing desperate. He's attacking Obama with vague guild-by-association smears and petty rips on his patriotism and character. So Obama is going to the headwaters of McCain scandal - The Keating Five. Obama very rarely attacks. But his counter-attacks are things of beauty.

Now comes the ugly part.

October 4, 2008


Kill two people and you go free. Pull guns in an argument over sport memorabilia, your ass is going to jail.

October 3, 2008

Off Topic

In the few interviews Sarah Palin has given, she very frequently ends up in a state of shocking silence, completely unable to answer the question before her. That didn't happen last night, so it was pronounced that she "beat expectations" The fact that these "expectations" were so low as to defy any sense didn't come up. She didn't actually answer any of the questions asked. She has a collection of talking points rattling around in her head, and each time it was her turn some random combination came rattling out. Sometimes it was on topic, sometimes not so much. Asked about the bailout, a energy talking point came out. Asked about Darfur, she said nonsense about not knowing the ways of Washington. The lack of follow-up questions is what saved her. If the format had allowed for follow-up questions, it would have made clear that not only didn't she know what policy to have in Darfur, she has no idea who, what or where Darfur is. When Biden declared that the GOP energy policy was nothing but "Drill, Drill, Drill" she replied that the policy was, in fact, "Drill, Baby, Drill" Zing!

As for Biden, he answered the damn question and answered it well. Not too much talking and no miscues.

All the post-debate polls are giving it Biden by a large margin. There are real limits to the expectations game.

October 2, 2008

Tonight's Debate, Illustrated

Two willy opponents, one experienced and battle tested, the other...not so much. A battle of wit and um, not wit. Knowledge v ignorance. A struggle that will shake the very foundation of democracy! When these two square off for the fate of the Republic it will be a deadly game of

Cat and Moose!


October 1, 2008


Bailout bill passes the Senate, pretty easily too. The bailout is a product of the squishy middle, and there are a lot more squishy middle types in the Senate than in the House. And the end of the world is put off for another day. We will see if they put enough goodies in this version to buy off the House on the second round.

Slow Torture

Why is CBS putting out Katie Couric murdering Sarah Palin in dribs and drabs? Now we have her claiming that McCain is fresh and new and Obama is more of the same. Claiming that she reads all newspapers. She can't name a Supreme Court case other than Roe V Wade. Stop the torture! Sarah Palin is completely unqualified for office. Why do we need to learn that slowly? Just put out all the stupid answers out at once, put a stake in her candidacy and let the Country move on. Why humiliate her bit by bit each day with a new clip?

It is up to Joe Biden to end this farce. He's got the only chance of ending this. He has 90 minutes in the spotlight to put her out of her misery. Joe, if you don't give her the mercy she deserves and end her candidacy Thursday night, we are in for five more weeks of this slow torture.

End it Joe. For all our sakes.


Obama up in Florida, Ohio, and Pennsylvania. He wins those three and its over. Of course, its not election day, so its not, in fact, over.

September 30, 2008

Stand Back, This Could be Bad

Have you seen trailers or ads for something called An American Carol. I firmly believe this could be the worse movie ever. Evidence is mounting:

Satire is supposed to tear down hypocrisy and demolish abusers of power, but this is a movie version of the The ½ Fox News Hour. It’s a bunch of rich and arrogant people making fun of free speech, dissenting opinions, minorities and being middle class. That’s not to say it couldn't have somehow worked, but Zucker is a poor marksman and his shotgun approach winds up shooting himself instead of making a point. A joke about a slave named Barack comes off racist, while Mel Brooks was able to hit the target in BLAZING SADDLES and bitch slap bigots with no backtalk.

Conservatives just can't be funny. Sad but true. If the jokes had worked they would have been liberal jokes.


September 29, 2008

Going to the Mattress

I am pleased to announce the opening of the First Craig Mattress Trust. I am happy to offer my mattress for anyone who wishes to stuff their life savings. Feeling unsure about your bank, mutual fund or hedge fund? With the mattress trust I offer an absolute guaranteed rate of return* and the very best security. I have a deadbolt. I am a very large and intimidating figure. I live in a very nice neighborhood (We have lots of Obama-Biden signs.) Plus, I'm very messey, and thus maintain the illusion of semi-poverty so no one would look in my mattress for any kind of payday. That's security you can depend on.

Put your faith in the First Craig Mattress Trust. Because everyone else is going to screw you.

*0 percent annual rate of return. Guaranteed.

Fail Out

The bail out bill fails in the House with most Republicans voting against it. Stock market is going down big. What the hell happened with McCain's man on a white horse bit? Does he suspend his campaign again? What the hell is going on with these guys?


Ezra Klien has a good point about the split between the voter reaction and the pundit reaction to the debate. McCain played to the pundits and won over the pundits. Obama played to the voters and won the voters.

Not everyone who watches the campaign is equal. If you would indulge me in a sports metaphor for a moment some voters are fans and some are the ball. The fans know who they are voting for. They are cheering for their guy to do well and the other guy to stumble. The undecided voters are the ball. They are who the candidates are playing for. The guy who gets his fans cheering loudest feels good about himself. They guy who wins the ball, wins. The pundits in this metaphor are the color guys in the announcer booth. You can impress the hell out of John Madden with your gutsy play, but if you don't put points on the board. Likewise, David Gergen could rule you the winner all day, but if the voter don't swing your way, you have lost my friend.

September 28, 2008

Tina Rules

The worst part is that the most ridiculous, incoherent Palin answer is a quote. The answer to the bailout question is a direct quote. The written joke lines are at least coherent. Palin is rapidly moving beyond our capacity to mock.

September 27, 2008

Bad Disney Movie

Two Men Enter, Two Men Leave

Nothing decisive last night. Things stayed pretty civil, considering the schoolyard pettiness that's been going on the last few weeks. Each side got their shots in. McCain needs to show his work. He keeps saying how Obama doesn't know anything and how he does, but he doesn't demonstrate why that's true. I can go around claiming I'm funny, but till I tell a joke, its just talk. Cutting earmarks won't actually solve any of our economic problems. Lots of people noted how pissed McCain is. Its like he's constantly on the verge of blowing his top, just cause he had to do the debate at all.

Obama won all the post-debate insta-polls, so that's something.

Palin-Biden up next. Biden was everywhere last night, doing the post-debate spin with happy-warrior enthusiasm on all the networks. Palin was...nowhere. Their debate should be worth watching.

September 26, 2008


So WaMu just died, Bush is doing the restore confidence speech thing that drains away all confidence again, there's no deal on the bailout, and McCain still remains committed to skiping the most important event remaining on the election calinder.

At this points, I'm not going to be surprised by anything else short of alien invation.

The Great Schlep

Introducing the greatest voter outreach program in history. The Great Schlep encourages Jewish kids to visit their grandparents in Florida and convince them to vote for Obama.

Here's Sarah Silverman introducing the concept. As is to be expected with Sarah, funny with questionable material.

The Great Schlep from The Great Schlep on Vimeo.

September 25, 2008

No Deal

Bailout deal is blowing up, with a bunch of Republicans deciding they don't want to be Socialists after all. Barny Frank is tearing them up on my TV even as I write this. I'm sorry it takes a financial meltdown, but anything that raises Frank's profile is good. He rocks.

So if there's no deal, does the world end? Does McCain not show for the debate, and does Obama get the full hour to talk?

What happens next? If the fate of the Nation wasn't at stake, I would be totally getting popcorn.

No Drama

During the primary it was often remarked upon that while the Clinton campaign was a raucous bunch, always fighting with each other and generally being chaotic, the Obama campaign was very calm: "No Drama Obama" Now its easier to be calm about stuff when you're winning, but even when Obama was down, there was never the panicky chaos that sometimes tripped up the Clinton campaign.

Well multiply that contrast by ten and you have the Obama-McCain race. McCain has gone though at least two major campaign shake-ups. Everybody gets fire shake-ups. McCain make crazy, unpredictable choices. Not just the one time, but over and over and over. Obama manages to resist the panic when he was down in the polls. (And good lord, we Dems love to panic) McCain goes down in the polls and it's hit the big red button time.

Micky Kaus is right (Oh Crap) a McCain Presidency would be exhausting.

September 24, 2008

Time Out? What the Hell?

John McCain is suspending his campaign? So we won? Suspending is what you do after you lose, right?

This is the craziest McCain move yet. One day of bad polls and these guys go wacky. What the hell is McCain going to do to get the bailout passed? Is he really not going to go to the debate on Friday night? Is Obama going to debate an empty chair?


1. Bush Speaks

2. I start poking around the T Rowe Price website, looking for a way out of the stock market.

3. I go to my bank's website, just to be sure about that whole federally insured thing.

4. Deposits insured up to 100,000 dollars. If you have more than that in your account, you're not protected.

5. Ha, Ha, Ha, Ha, Ha, Ha, Ha. $100,000. Ha, Ha, Ha, Ha, Ha.

6. Panic over.

Free Sarah Palin!

Poll Porn

Polls have been far too mixed for far too long to properly indulge. But here's Washington Post-ABC News giving Obama a 9 point national lead. Woo.

September 23, 2008

Your Moment of Zen

And you think I have trouble spelling.


Cats and Dogs, Living Together

George Will is making sense:

It is arguable that, because of his inexperience, Obama is not ready for the presidency. It is arguable that McCain, because of his boiling moralism and bottomless reservoir of certitudes, is not suited to the presidency. Unreadiness can be corrected, although perhaps at great cost, by experience. Can a dismaying temperament be fixed?

September 22, 2008


Good lord, could we not have Bush seek to assure anyone. Everytime he talks about the economy or stock market, I have the overwhelming urge to sell my meager stock holdings. I know I can't be the only one with the feeling.

The Plan

Everybody hates it, left and right. A 700 billion dollar bailout of Wall Street is going to be incredibly easy to attack. On one side you have the Bush administration claiming that the world will end without it, on the other you have the fundamental wrongness of the whole enterprise. The initial proposal is 700 billion, no strings attached, spent at the complete discretion of the Bush Administration. I figure something gets passed, but a lot going to get added, like relief for regular folks and regular beatings for financial hotshots. This is going to be an interesting week.

September 20, 2008

September 19, 2008


Steve Benen points out that Palin is taking over the ticket -

Yesterday, in the midst of a speech, Sarah Palin told voters about what they could expect from a "Palin and McCain administration." Seriously, there's video of it.

What's more, ABC News' Jake Tapper added that he's heard Palin refer to John McCain as her "running mate," a designation Tapper said he's never heard a "VP nominee use when discussing the guy at the top of the ticket."

And just to add insult to injury, Jonathan Martin reports that twice this week, he's noticed a fair number of people leave campaign rallies after Palin speaks, not sticking around long enough to hear what John McCain has to say. It happened on Tuesday in Ohio, and again yesterday in Iowa.

Not that I want to see this ship of fools elected, but I wonder how this plays out in a McCain Administration. Vice-Presidents are only as powerful as the President makes them. I always figured Palin would get a nothing portfolio. After all, McCain the warrior is not going to defer to girl in any Affair of State that matters. But what if Palin just steals the Presidency out from under McCain? This is a democracy after all, power, in the end, comes from popular support. So what if Palin has all the support? All the conservatives in Congress will support her over McCain. All the conservative institutions like talk radio and interest groups like the NRA and Pro-Life folks like her better. McCain may be end up like the old rich bugger who finds that his trophy wife is running the business.

Worse. Ever.

Bush is going to be regarded as the worse President in history. Charles Krauthammer is hoping for a Truman-style redemption down the road, but he is wrong. I don't have time to go into details right now, but rest assured, whole books, series of books, ten-part volumes will be written on how bad this President was.

September 17, 2008


Well, here's a newspaper quote that just about sums up the situation perfectly -

Though she has been on the campaign trail for nearly three weeks, Palin has yet to hold a press conference, and this morning's stop marked the first time she answered a question from the press on the fly, prompting concerned looks from staffers.

This is quite possibly the most ludicrous situation in American political history. A Vice-Presidential candidate that will not take questions? Who won't hold press conferences? Answering questions from the press is a huge part of the modern Presidency. A Vice-President who is not just reluctant, but afraid? The staff look concerned any time she come near a microphone? Unreal.

Ah Crap

I use Yahoo! mail. Is nothing safe?


Ban on baggy pants ruled unconstitutional. Yay freedom.


Not to be a legal nitpicker or anything, but I'm with LG&M - what exactly is the legal basis for spending 80 billion dollars and almost completely taking over an insurance company? Not to be too technical, but Congress spends the money in our system. Where was Congress in all this?

Own, and now that we've nationalized a rather large chunk of the economy in recent days, how are we going to run these companies? Personally I vote for worker run collectives. And don't try and tell me it wouldn't work. If having a highly paid CEO running your company worked, we wouldn't be in this mess.

September 16, 2008

Where's My Rescue?

It would be a lot cheaper to rescue me. I'm not nearly in the money pit that A.I.G. is. We are not talking billions here. Just a couple of million dollars will help ensure my financial future well into the 21st Century.

Sort of

While the complete and total meltdown of the stock market (500 Points!) is nothing good, at least the political debate can swing back to actual affairs of state, instead of what lipstick on a pig "means." Its really too bad that it takes disasters like wars and economic train-wrecks to move the political conversation off of the totally trivial.

September 15, 2008

What the Hell, Hero?

Just what the heck does "The Fundamentals Of Our Economy Are Strong" mean, anyway? Huge investment banks are failing. That's a pretty fundamental part of the economy going boom. If stocks go down and the banks are in good shape, then yes, the fundamentals are strong. If the investment bank that buy and sell stocks goes under, then stocks go down, the fundamentals of the economy are in trouble.

September 13, 2008

Morning Inspiration

Worried about polls? Try this:

If you need something more high-minded here's "Les Misbarack" its, well, um:

Feel better? I know I do.

September 12, 2008

No Idea

Palin didn't have any clue as to what "the Bush Doctrine" meant. She tries to wriggle out like a champ, but she apparent just didn't get to that chapter of her crash course in world affairs.

James Fallows does the best job explaining why this is so bad:

Sarah Palin did not know this issue, or any part of it. The view she actually expressed -- an endorsement of "preemptive" action -- was fine on its own merits. But it is not the stated doctrine of the Bush Administration, it is not the policy her running mate has endorsed, and it is not the concept under which her own son is going off to Iraq.

How could she not know this? For the same reason I don't know anything about European football/soccer standings, trades, or intrigue. I am not interested enough. And she evidently has not been interested enough even to follow the news of foreign affairs during the Bush era.

A further point. The truly toxic combination of traits GW Bush brought to decision making was:

1) Ignorance
2) Lack of curiosity
3) "Decisiveness"

That is, he was not broadly informed to begin with (point 1). He did not seek out new information (#2); but he nonetheless prided himself on making broad, bold decisions quickly, and then sticking to them to show resoluteness.

We don't know about #2 for Palin yet -- she could be a sponge-like absorber of information. But we know about #1 and we can guess, from her demeanor about #3. Most of all we know something about the person who put her in this untenable role.

September 11, 2008

Jump the Pig

I keep hoping that one day, a Republican attack will be so stupid and disingenuous, that they will forever be labeled stupid and disingenuous. Could "lipstick on a pig" be that attack? One can only hope.

September 10, 2008

Drilling for Oil

The next scandal:

The Interior Department agency that collects oil and gas royalties has been caught up in a wide-ranging ethics scandal — including allegations of financial self-dealing, accepting gifts from energy companies, cocaine use and sexual misconduct.
The investigation also concluded that several of the officials “frequently consumed alcohol at industry functions, had used cocaine and marijuana, and had sexual relationships with oil and gas company representatives.”

They were literally in bed with the oil industry. Not a metaphor. These were the people who's job it was to make sure the public got a good deal when oil companies drilled on public land. And they got bought off with blow and blow.

Oh and John McCain was the chair of the commerce committee during this scandal, which oversees this department.

A Smear too Far

The latest McCain attack ad accuses Obama of passing legislation to teach "'comprehensive sex education' to kindergartners." The horror. In reality the program was designed to help protect kids from predators, by teaching them what "bad touching" is. So McCain manages to twist protecting kids into corrupting kids. Quite an achievement in smears, eh? So how dirty do you get before you lose your honor? So fine - you want to go there? John McCain opposes protecting kids from sexual abuse. McCain would rather see your kids molested than lose an election.